Good Morning BAFFL Nation!
Hope you have all enjoyed the long weekend so far and are soaking up the last moments on this rainy Monday.
As we continue to hurtle towards the BAFFL draft a light speed – it’s time to continue with our wall-to-wall coverage of the league at BAFFL.ca with our annual Mock Keeper list!
BAFFL is a unique league – 2 keepers is just enough where managers can build up a sizeable advantage through strong talent management, or make their hopes extremely dim for the year ahead, but it’s never enough to guarantee a championship, nor lose the season before the first game is played. With that said – judging by some of these rosters, some managers are doing their best to lose or have just mailed it in altogether. Without further ado, let’s get to it, starting with the 2023-2024 BAFFL Champions and working our way down!
Delamere Dawgpound:
Projected Keepers: Davante Adams, Josh Jacobs
Honorable mentions: George Kittle, Joe Flacco, Amari Cooper, Kenneth Walker III
Grade: B-
Analysis: while the Dawgpound were full credit for their BAFFL championship, nobody will mistake these guys for the favourites heading into the 2024-2025 season. The Dawgpound finished 8th in the regular season, and squeaked into the playoffs at 6-8, picked up Joe Flacco and, well, the rest is history. Davante Adams is 31 and will either have Gardner Minshew or Aiden O’Connell throwing him the ball. Josh Jacobs is headed to Lambeau and while he should have a major upgrade in the offense he’ll play in, it’s always a risky proposition for running backs moving to their second team. Will this be a Christian McCaffrey situation where he is unshackled from his terrible roster, or Dalvin Cook on the Jets? Time will tell!
NT Angry Birds
Projected Keepers: Jonathan Taylor, De’Von Achane
Honorable mentions: Joe Mixon, Brandon Aiyuk
Grade : A-
Analysis : Two years ago GMGrove was on top of the world, with Taylor coming off a 2100 all purpose yards, 20TD season, and at 23 years old looking like the best keeper to own hands down. In the two seasons since (which to be fair have been plagued by injuries and contract disputes), Taylor has combined for 1900 yards and 12 TDs in 21 games. However, proving the importance of the BAFFL draft, the Birbs struck gold with their 7th round pick last year, drafting De’Von Achane, who exploded for back to back 50 burgers last year and finished the season with 11 TDs in as many games. In a half-PPR league, we expect that this 22 year old will be the future face of the franchise, especially as Mostert’s role continues to diminish as he enters the twilight of his NFL career.
AA Magikarps
Projected Keepers: Christian McCaffrey, DJ Moore
Honorable mentions: Cooper Kupp
Grade: B+ overall (A+ Christian McCaffrey, C- DJ Moore)
Analysis: The Karps have the consensus, no doubt #1 overall keeper for the upcoming season, and have him backed up by the WR20. The Karps could be in the market for an upgrade at the second keeper slot, but we suspect the price will be too steep for GM Dufresne to pay up, and he’ll instead opt to keep one of his receivers. While you can’t tell the history of the Karps without Cooper Kupp, BAFFL is a ruthless business and Puka Nacua is just too good, smiley, and wholesome for the Karps to roll the dice on Kupp returning to his 2022 form.
Hibicus Battle Hogz
Projected Keepers: AJ Brown, PROJECTED TRADE – Nick Chubb
Honorable mentions: Tank Dell, Mark Andrews, Rashee Rice
Grade: B+
Analysis: It’s been a troubling offseason for the Battle Hogz, with Tank Dell getting shot, and Rashee Rice possibly ending up on the Commissioner’s exempt list after an offseason where he found himself in the headlines more than once for his off-field activities. With the Hogz looking to establish a winning culture in search of their first championship, they are likely to cut ties and bring in some leadership to the locker room. It’s been the worst kept secret in BAFFL offseason that the Hogz have been trying to land Nick Chubb, and it was reported that GM Desormeaux was furiously messaging members of the BAFFL chat to take down videos of Chubb squatting what seemed to be nearly a thousand pounds. While the videos have brought hope to the Dawgpound, it will be a surprise to no one if Chubb ends up on the PUP list for the first 4 games, and we expect this news will drive the price down to the point where a deal can be made.
Creek Crossing ZenSharks
Projected Keepers: Breece Hall, Jahmyr Gibbs,
Honorable mentions: DK Metcalf, Keenan Allen (you idiots)
Grade: A+
Analysis: The Sharks are in BAFFL heaven at this point in the season – with two stud running backs entering their second and third NFL seasons. The draft is wide open for the sharks, who can pluck the best player available while other managers duke it out for Trey Benson and Zamir white in the second round. Now, GM Shark still has to draft well, and this year won’t have the plethora of picks he is used to having. He’s proven before he is fully capable of blowing the draft, but if he can just manage to not royally fuck it up this year, the Sharks should be in prime position to compete this year and for the next several on the back of these two workhorses.
Team Harvey
Projected Keepers: Tyreek Hill, Saquon Barkley
Honorable mentions: Raheem Mostert, Tom Brady, Mike Evans
Grade: A+
Analysis: Before they were even in the league the yet to be named team and reinstated GM Harvey were complaining about their lack of draft capital, and lobbying for supplemental draft picks in the second(!!!) round. In a shameful display in stark contrast to his normal iron fist rule, Commissioner Bob had the gall to ask the board of directors if the request should be granted. Memo to GM Harvey: this isn’t Venezuela, there are no handouts in this league! There’s a long line of aspiring GMs who would kill for the chance to enter the greatest league in the history of fantasy sports, especially with two of the best keepers in the entire league! While we welcome one of the founding members of BAFFL back with open arms – we also need to put him on notice that you’re on thin ice pal, this is BAFFL and you gotta work for what you get!
Thresher Tornados:
Projected Keepers : Justin Jefferson, Travis Etienne Jr.
Dishonorable mentions : Chris Olave, Drake London
Grade: B
Analysis: Last year’s consensus #1 player gets a major downgrade at QB this year with either Sam Darnold or JJ McCarthy throwing him the ball. Jefferson is good enough to still be an elite WR, but it likely takes him out of cream of the keeper crop conversation for now. Etienne Jr is a solid, young keeper, who has the potential to be great if the Jags offense can right the ship and Trevor Lawrence can take the next step. The Tornados are the classic example of the team who is kind of in the middle at the moment: their keepers won’t give them a huge leg up this season, nor will they put them behind the 8 ball. This year – GM Brent hopes that everyone will shit on his draft, as for the past several years the Tornados have been consistently crowned champions of the draft only to flame out as the season progresses.
Moustache Mystics :
Projected Keepers: Ja’Marr Chase, Sam LaPorta
Honorable mentions : Javonte Williams (RB29 – which in BAFFL is basically a sure-fire keeper most years)
Grade: A
Analysis: The Mystics have two great keepers to build their team around this year. Chase has proven to be one of the most electric receivers in the NFL, and was able to put up numbers with Jake Browning at QB. With a healthy Burrow and entering his third season, the sky is the limit for the star receiver. Sam LaPorta had the best rookie season of any tight end ever, and could be a 10-15 year keeper, giving the Mystics a major advantage at the position for years to come. The big problem: the Mystics have no RB keeper, and drafting 10th overall they may be looking at James Conner as their RB1. The Mystics may have to go big game hunting and hope to find this year’s Achane, Williams, or Mostert – but the first few weeks could be rough as they try to find two startable RBs in a league where D’Onta Foreman was drafted last year, and third string RBs are regularly kept on BAFFL benches.
Crevasse Cheeks :
Projected Keepers: Puka Nacua, Bijan Robinson
Honorable mentions : Nick Chubb
Grade: A
Analysis: One #1 overall BAFFL pick, and one draft afterthought who barely anyone had on their radar coming into last season. The Cheeks dynamic keeper duo proves you need a mix of both acquiring can’t miss prospects, and finding the diamonds in the rough deep in the BAFFL drafts and on the waiver wire. The Cheeks are in a great spot this year with two elite young keepers, and a bevy of draft picks (including four 5th rounders) to surround their young stars with the talent needed to compete for a championship.
Aconitum Wolves :
Projected Keepers: CeeDee Lamb, Amon-Ra St-Brown (already completed trade)
Dishonorable mentions : Najee Richardson
Grade: B+
Analysis: The Wolves have two of the best young receivers in the game, both of whom should be in line for monster seasons this year on dynamic offenses. Like the Mystics, they will be dumpster diving for RB talent, though they do have the advantage of drafting third overall. So while RB1 may be an upgrade over James Conner (think Kenneth Walker III or Rachaad White) – RB2 might be Devin Singletary or Austin Ekeler.
Voldemorts :
Projected Keepers: Alvin Kamara, Rhamondre Stevenson
Honorable mentions: none
Grade: D+
Analysis: We’ve certainly seen worse than keeping the RB17 and RB19 (see: Dalvin Cook last year), but the Voldemorts are definitely in tough and could desperately use an upgrade. Unfortunately, with St. Brown already dealt and Chubb likely heading to the Hogz, I’m not sure the Voldemorts will find an upgrade that’s worth the price. On the plus side, the Volds will head into the draft with two running backs who you can start, and the second overall pick in the draft, so they have options. They could choose to bolster their RB room, or go best player available and big-game hunt on dart throw RBs while Stevenson and Kamara hold down the fort for the first few weeks.
🦍🦍🦍:
Projected Keepers: James Cook, Garrett Wilson
Honorable mentions: none
Grade: C
Analysis: The BIG GUYs ship sank early last year with Wilson dealt a huge blow losing Rogers, and Diggs starting the season in terrible form. These are by no means elite keepers, but there is room for optimism for gorilla nation. James Cook’s role on the Bills offense continued to build towards the end of last season, and it can’t get much worse than Wilson’s QB situation last year. However, despite the optimism a lot of things need to go right for GM Allen to return to the playoffs, and after passing on Breece Hall and Jahmyr Gibbs in the past two drafts to take David Mongtomery and Dameon Pierce, GM Allen is under immense pressure to make the most of his 6th overall pick in the upcoming draft.
Lords of the Valley:
Projected Keepers: Kyren Williams, Patrick Mahomes
Honorable mentions: Deebo Samuel
Grade: C
Analysis: Never one to be a slave to the rankings (see: Cook, Dalvin J) GM Nyler opts to keep QB1 Patrick Mahomes over dual threat wideout Deebo Samuel. What a mess this team would be if they hadn’t struck gold in the 11th round last year with Kyren Williams. With a top 10 RB, QB1, and the 5th overall draft pick, the Lords could definitely be in a worse spot, but they will need to rely on their drafting champion to build a roster that can compete for a title this year. Prediction: he instructs Bob to draft a player already taken/kept within the first two rounds, and Bob runs out of players on his draft board by round 6 and we just use consensus rankings for the rest.
Pepsiland Pontooners:
Projected Keepers: Derrick Henry, Isiah Pacheco
Honorable mentions: Travis Kelce
Grade: B+
Analysis: Chomps’ (III? IV? V?) new owner at long last breaks up the dynamic duo of Henry and Kelce that he’s been riding for so many years. While Kelce undoubtedly still has plenty of juice left, GM Guy worries that last year might be the blueprint going forward: use Kelce sparingly for the first 10 weeks or so of the season in order to have him rested and healthy for the stretch run/playoffs. If you look at just the rankings for this year, keeping Kelce and Henry could be the play, but GM Guy decides to go with the youth movement and lock in a star, young RB to a long term contract, while keeping Henry around for another year or two to mentor the future face of the franchise.
BAFFL 